SHAKER HEIGHTS, OH—Unseen to all but the most trained observer, the veneer of the Johnsons’ perfect suburban life was reportedly just a facade concealing a pleasant family with several fun lawn games. According to sources, the Johnsons’ white picket fence, trimmed hedges, and pristine garage containing two shiny cars belied what was secretly a pretty easy-going family unit who enjoyed playing corn hole, bocce ball, and croquet. Sources told reporters that you’d never think it from the way they smiled and waved when you passed them on the street, but the very same family that gathered with the community for their children’s Little League games and ballet recitals was, unbeknownst to their neighbors, already thinking of purchasing a ladder toss set and maybe oversized Jenga blocks for the next time the cousins visit. Sources added that it was only a matter of time until the Johnsons’ long-hidden proclivity for enjoying lawn darts along with some iced tea and finger sandwiches burst out into the daylight for the whole town to gawk at.