Onion Sports' NFL Week 14 Picks
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Onion Sports’ NFL Conference Championships Picks

Onion Sports’ NFL Conference Championships Picks

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Onion Sports shares its expert analysis on the teams that will come away with victory in the NFL’s Conference Championships.

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49ers At Eagles

49ers At Eagles

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49ers: An upset win shocks the Philadelphia crowd who are still sober enough to follow what’s happening in the game.

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49ers Coach

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Kyle Shanahan: Ready to show that his performance as offensive coordinator in the Falcons’ massive Super Bowl LI choke was no fluke.

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Eagles Coach

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Nick Sirianni: Has silenced his doubters by managing to string together a credible coaching career despite going undrafted.

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49ers Quarterback

49ers Quarterback

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Brock Purdy: The rookie has 12 touchdowns to three interceptions despite needing to use both of his tiny hands to throw the football.

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Eagles Quarterback

Eagles Quarterback

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Jalen Hurts: Philly’s QB is a lock for MVP, so at this point he probably doesn’t care whether the Eagles win this game or not.

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49ers Receiver To Watch

49ers Receiver To Watch

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Deebo Samuel: The electric wideout led the league in bending the time-space continuum with the most catches after the catch.

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Eagles Receiver To Watch

Eagles Receiver To Watch

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A.J. Brown: The Eagles receiver has it all: hands, legs, feet, arms, ears, a neck, you name it.

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49ers Defender To Watch

49ers Defender To Watch

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Nick Bosa: The defensive end fully utilizes his strength and power to burst through quarterbacks.

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Eagles Defender To Watch

Eagles Defender To Watch

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Javon Hargrave: The Eagles’ defensive tackle contributed to his team’s record 70 sacks this season, many of which were made during football games.

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X-Factor

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Eagles fans may start celebrating a little too early by burning down Lincoln Financial Field several hours before kickoff.

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Bengals At Chiefs

Bengals At Chiefs

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Chiefs: Expect Patrick Mahomes to hobble for over 50 yards and limp for two touchdowns.

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Bengals Coach

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Zac Taylor: Despite some recent success, it’s hard to fathom how Taylor still has a job after failing to win a Super Bowl with Andy Dalton.

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Chiefs Coach

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Andy Reid: There’s no coach more primed and focused on triumphantly returning to the Super Bowl buffet.

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Bengals Quarterback

Bengals Quarterback

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Joe Burrow: Cincy’s phenom QB has proven he has what it takes to lose the Super Bowl.

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Chiefs Quarterback

Chiefs Quarterback

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Patrick Mahomes: Despite suffering a high ankle sprain during last weekend’s matchup, Mahomes is confident he still has the mobility to reach the medical tent.

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Bengals Receiver To Watch

Bengals Receiver To Watch

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Ja’Marr Chase: The explosive wideout has great burst, game-breaking speed, and excellent hands, but insists on constantly wearing tacky animal prints.

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Chiefs Receiver To Watch

Chiefs Receiver To Watch

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Marquez Valdes-Scantling: He will need to rely on his large frame and top-end speed if he wants any chance at getting one of Travis Kelce’s targets.

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Bengals Defender To Watch

Bengals Defender To Watch

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Trey Hendrickson: The defensive end isn’t letting a broken wrist keep him from playing in the AFC Championship Game, which is frankly scary and honestly kind of fucked up.

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Chiefs Defender To Watch

Chiefs Defender To Watch

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Carlos Dunlap: The pass rusher’s mother asked us to mention that he’s earned a Masters of Business Administration and that he should really think about working for his uncle at the fireplace store.

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X-Factor

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The AFC Championship could spell trouble for the Chiefs, and head coach Andy Reid may struggle focusing on the task at hand as it is scheduled right during dinner time.

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